I was told I was special, a different person.  Ever since my fiance has been in the hospital i have felt different and special. God has given me the courage to think about others before myself.  I use to be a selfish person and didn't care about other people, but now as I have a fiance that just through a stroke and having cancer on top of that, I realize he needs my help, before I need to take care of myself.  I gave up all the plans me and him made for to be with him.  My whole spring break, instead of going to Disney or the Beach, or anything fun, I stayed with him in the hospital, while he was going through all his treatments.  Didn't care of what other people were doing or saying, I needed to stay with Brian.  As I got back to school, everyone was like "I can't believe you stayed there with him the whole week of Spring Break,"  I got really annoyed when people kept saying that, because I realized if they were in the same shoes as I was, they wouldn't do what I just did.  I realized at this small college I attend, there is a lot of selfish people, and greedy, and cruel.  

Why wouldn't I stay with Brian, he's my fiance, I'm going to marry him in a year.  I love him very much, I'm not going to leave his side.  Teachers and faulty keep telling me that everything will be fine, and happy for us and happy that Brian is getting better quickly, quicker than we all expected.  God has made us strong, gave him the willpower to get better and come back to be the bubbly man he is.  

I'm proud of what I became I am a different person, I'm human, I not shutting myself in my shell, I have opened up and breathed the air.  Now I just need to fight and make a whole new life for me.  I'm very excited to be apart of Brian's family and friends and as for him being apart of my family and friends.  Also I turn back to my spiritual family and all the saints.  I have lost myself and I haven't been praying like I'm suppose too, and receiving communion.  God and Jesus use to be the biggest and important part of my life and somewhere in my life I drifted far away in the middle of the sea of sins of others.  God is bringing me back and is giving me a new life, a new me, a man of my dreams, friends that i have never had growing up, a big family.  Cheers for the New Beginning!